Noun Genders

The Washington Post asked its readers to assign a gender to a noun of their choice and explain their reasons:

KIDNEYS — female, because they always go to the bathroom in pairs.

HOT AIR BALLOON: male, because to get it to go anywhere you have to light a fire under it… and, of course, there’s the hot air part.

SPONGES — female, because they are soft and squeezable and retain water.

WEB PAGE — female, because it is always getting hit on.

ZIPLOC BAGS — male, because they hold everything in, but you can always see right through them.

HOURGLASS — female, because over time, the weight shifts to the bottom.

HAMMER — male, because it hasn’t evolved much over the last 5,000 years, but it’s handy to have around.

REMOTE CONTROL — female. HA! You thought I’d say male. But consider this: It gives man pleasure, he’d be lost without it, and while he doesn’t always know the right buttons to push, he keeps trying.